it was never as simple as we thought to be true, there were just things we never knew.

I can't un-know so much of what I know now...the diseases and meds and chronic pain have brought with them so much knowledge that I never wanted. 

I thought that life was hard before all of this...now, I wish for that level of difficulty again. 

I don't want to deal with this flare up right now...I don't feel that I have the strength for it right now, and yet, here it is. 

...I'm like the hot dog, clinging on for dear life.